Some tasks require more strength than others. Power is needed.

Scripture states that The Creator formed the earth without having to use his upper body strength. The words “finger work” were used to describe the task of creating the entire planet. This is almost unimaginable. And utterly impossible at human standards. All things, the tallest mountain to the smallest particle were made from scratch with only the use of his fingers.   Even if all of mankind worked together, we could never come close to this level of power.

No one else can offer that level of Power. He has no competition.

Believing without seeing is honored. I believed when I was a tiny little girl.  But, seeing The All Mighty at work solidified my devotion.

He has more power than I can imagine. But I saw a lot. As a child, I was confused by my circumstances.  I am not confused anymore. While he allowed my parents to submit me to satanism. He never left me.

He mastered time and knew what I would need later in my life. He created an opportunity for me to ask for help in a way that mattered later. This was important because in my recovery I needed to know that I did what I could to get out of the situation. It made a notable difference in my ability to love myself.

It was more profound than that. He shielded my innocents as I was being raped. This sounds impossible. But I was raped three times before I was nine years old. However, each event happened in a matter that kept me unaware of the details of the physical act. The first time my face was covered. I believed that I had been stabbed by a blunt object, like a knife. The other two times the attacker approached me from behind. Again, I believed that they stabbed me with a blunt object. I knew these men would hurt me. However I still though mommas and daddy’s made babies loving each other. When the abuse started, I was oblivious to Lust. This innocence remained. He will let mankind make our own choices, but he will shield the children.

He taught me how to call on the name of the Lord. Jesus physically came to my rescue. As he entered, there was this sound. It was like thunder times a thousand, but inside a building. I had been encircled, trapped by a group of adults. As they heard me call, they scattered like roaches fleeing when a light is turned on. He has more power than any human can comprehend.

In all my experiences, practitioners of magic are only seeking safety. They seek power in order to protect, defend and provide for themselves. The fact that the training they experience kills the softness of their human hearts, well that  weakens them. They go to all extremes to overtake others, who might harm them.

The power differential between that of the ALL Mighty God and those offered by creatures that he created is massive.  One of the biggest struggles for those of us who have stood against the occult is not to find safety but to accept that we have access to all the power in all of creation. Scripture talks about faith and how faith the size of a mustard seed can move a mountain. I have seen that having the faith to simply call on the name of Jesus can Rock the environment and dismantle all threats against me.

I was drowning, In the beginning of my healing process. Sure, I was praying about it but until I gave this process over to God, I was losing my mind.

Remembering things like memorizing the Lords Prayer without having read it kept my head spinning. With God, I learned that when things do not make sense (add up) there was missing information. I learned that nothing is hidden from him and that with him I could have access to all the information I needed.

It was more than that. He fed me information in increments that he knew were right for me. It was a lot to handle but never more than I could handle. This is how I have managed not to form other personalities. During this I was able to keep a job and raise a child.

My process:

•  I allotted two hours a day to focus on the memories.

I only let myself think about ritual abuse for two hours a day. I had been having church at home in the morning for quite some time. I just extended the time period to two hours. Then I changed this to happen during the evening so that I could sleep afterwards.  

I thought of this as, “Going In”. This helped me feel safe. Thinking of my daily life as separate from these events allowed me to continue to work, laugh and pay bills.

During this I would lay in bed. I began with a prayer that not only asked God to be with me but that He and all of heaven “Go in” with me. He never fails. I adjusted to this well enough that I could feel a build up of negativity release after I began to pray. At that point, I would “Go In” and allow myself to focus on what I was beginning to remember.

Sometimes during the day, thoughts would rush in, but I was easily able to put them aside because I knew that I would be able to address them in a safe way. That worked well for a while. There were times toward the end, that I failed at this, but I always got back on track.

•  I Kept this to myself until I found some understanding.

I did not tell anyone about what was happening to me. This kept me from having to talk about it and bring it into my thoughts. This was between me and heaven until I found some understanding and was able to compartmentalize the abuse. It prevented me from being judged or mis guided by people. At a point in which I felt safe to do so I told select loved ones that I had been raped in a ritual.

•  I started taking better care of myself.

I would take daily walks, get a proper amount of sleep, eat well and take vitamins.  I knew that I needed all the strength that I could get. So, I made sure that not only did I limit the time that I focused on memories of evil, but I also spent more time and focus on simple good health.

I know that my process was custom fit for me. However, I did not come up with this on my own. God customized it. He knew what I could do, how fast I could go and where each step lead to.  Its handy to serve a God who knows everything.

One of the main things that survivors fear is not being believed. This fear can seem hard to overcome. Historically those who talk about being ritually abused were deemed lunatics, dismissed.

This is a trap. I was not created to be trapped. So, with prayer I became calm and began to see this traps structure and I broke free.

These are the steps I took:

Commit a period every day to pray. I start with gratitude. Often, I thank him for each part of my body. Focus on blessings and facts become clearer.

Some of what I experienced was demonic and beyond the normal range of knowledge. However, those events are real and can be proven true. They did leave evidence.

Yet, some of the most bizarre elements of my experiences were often experienced under hypnotic delusions that were created by the abusers. These parts of my experiences could not be proven, because they did not happen.

When I let God control my healing, he showed me the difference between the things I experienced under delusion and what really took place. If I had spoken out before I learned which was real and which was delusion I could have been easily disproven.

This was way more profound than that. I discovered that, not only was God guiding my healing he was preparing me for healing during the abuse.

•  We have found strength in numbers.

Past attempts to expose ritual abuse were hushed. Even today, most people don’t know that during the satanic panic more than three hundred thousand police reports were filed. All those people were not lying.

Currently many reports of ritual abuse are being dismissed as simply sexual abuse stories. Some of them are used as scape goats and the media distorts the truth.

Those of us who have experienced ritual abuse easily gain the discernment that is needed to see that ritual abuse is being uncovered.

Do not be fooled, all pedophilia has satanic origins.

I read the stories of other victims and find many similarities. No one should ever be abused however it is hopeful to know that I am not alone.

Within my abuse hypnotic delusions were used to convince me that I was being dominated. When I tried to run home, they feed me a delusion that I had made it home. Only to slowly reveal to me that I was chained to the ritual table. On this same night I was also kicked in the ribs only to have my ribs numbed with a spell the next morning.

They work to seem all powerful. However, if they were as powerful as they seem they would not need to use delusions to dominate.

The truth is that they are not powerful at all. I have seen the name of the Lord, scatter them like roaches when the light is turned on.

On my own, I am easily defeated however with God I have use of all the power. I just must let it be perfect.

•  Those who matter most will believe.

I had to let go of the fact that some people will not believe me. Even if some of those are my loved ones. I came to the realization that those like me, those who need healing will believe me. With so much about pedophile rings in the news I know that more of the truth about ritual abuse will come in due time. Until then, I can enjoy that some people can remain ignorant of these facts. It can be comforting to know that some are still that innocent.

• Be still
• Ask God what really happened.
• We have found strength in numbers.
• Understand Power
• Those who matter most will believe.

Fear is a paralytic trick. Like cancer it grows, consumes, and can easily put a life in lock down. A few years ago, I realized that I had never felt safe, ever. Not for one moment. Why had I chosen imprisonment? Jesus talked about freedom. Yet Christianity is most often a constraint. So where is freedom? The occult had seemed to have hidden it.

I have found it. First, I had to throw away the legalistic rules that weighed me down with guilt.  This began when I committed to, two hours of prayer every morning. My conscious, which had been, a nudge when my behavior was bad, became a source of enveloping warmth and all needed information. This perfect warmth never leaves me.  Sitting here now I cannot think of any greater pleasure than to just sit with my lord. 

Even, my guilt has no hold on me. My freedom came when I realized that the behavioral changes that I needed to make came without effort as I committed to spending time with him.  Every day, he encourages me without judgement. I know their will be a day of judgement for all of mankind. But until then he inspires. I look at changes that I need to make and the next day my behavior gets better. He does not expect me to be perfect.  This is true repentance. Living a life of repentance has set me free and placed a shield around me that makes me untouchable. I not only don’t feel the fear I see that I have nothing to fear.

Now, I am untouchable. This is not some dreamy idea. Here is just one example. 

Six months ago, while on a trip, I heard a clicking noise as I was falling asleep snuggling my dog. It was that click one hears when a hotel door is unlocked. I was in a hotel room with a defenseless puppy. I did hear God speak in this moment. Still, this should have forced me into a fighting position. But no, I fell asleep. The next morning, I woke feeling rested, gooey. I was puzzled about what had happened while I was falling asleep. But I laid still feeling loved. I delayed getting up. It is rare for me to sleep that well in a hotel. But when I did move, I realized that my legs were hanging off the bed. I gasped for air as a result to the shock. This alarmed me but I shook it off for a while.

In prayer I asked for an explanation. I knew that there was missing information. I did remember hearing the voice of God as the door clicked. So, I focused on that. I remembered what he said. He said, they are coming but I won’t let them do anything to you. I continued asking for further explanation.

I got it. Three people came into my room. They were wearing cloaks with hoods that only left a slight chance of exposing their faces, which I never saw. One was a dominate male. There was a passive smaller male and a woman. While they stood over me, she said, “Cute Dog”. The dominate male replied. “She is not supposed to do that.” He was referring to the fact that sleeping with pets is considered an occult practice. The third person did not speak but I believe was a less dominate male. I remained unconscious as they moved me into a sitting position. I did not fight or respond to the intrusion. That is not like me, or anyone. Also, I sat without assistance which leaves me to believe that I had been put into a trance which had been done many times in my childhood. This was apart of the mind control sessions.

There were the four of us in the room. But they all began to look behind me, toward the corner of the room. Someone or something spoke and informed them that they could not take me. “She is going against us!” The dominate male responded. I learned in childhood that even though I refused witchcraft they had standards about what could be done to me. They were not allowed to hurt me unless they could justify it with the idea that they are defending themselves. In truth, I was going against them as I was on a trip to meet a group of people who I have now bonded with in efforts to make a stand against ritual abuse.

In childhood, they tried to get me to renounce Jesus by saying that they could teach me to defend myself. This was ridicules because they were fueling a false need for defense by hurting me.

They left and obviously failed to place my legs back onto the bed. This would have caused me to wake due to the uncomfortable position. My God not only protected me he forced me into the deepest sleep I had in quite some time. He is glorious.

The all mighty God is handy to have around. He protects me from evil forces that wish to kidnap me for the purposes of mind control. He also provides good sleep. I can not express the level of happiness that I have come to enjoy since I learned to repent.

I questioned why God allowed them to put me in a trance. I am his servant and under his protection. But after a while I realized how many members of the occult have come to the truth when they see that the one true God will stop them in their tracks. He is all powerful and perfect.